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Friday, October 9, 2009

what you dont know.

whats not being said
was how my days were brighter with you in them
how unstoppable i felt with your arm around me
or how i felt when your eyes burned through me
whats not being said
was how i loved to talk about you to my friends
how i was so proud to be your girl
and how i couldnt sleep without you next to me
whats not being said
was how perfect, absolutely perfect i thought you were
how although i said it often, i never wanted you to leave me
how ive never met anyone who made me feel this way
whats not being said
was how jealous i was of any girls before me
how your words, simply occupied my mind for hours
how you still give me butterflies
whats not being said
was how i wanted you to meet my family
how i wanted to introduce you to my brother
how i could see you in my life
whats not being said
how much this last year has been the best year of my life
how beautiful you are
how much i feel for you.
whats not being said
is now too late.

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i miss you so much. why cant i just be like any other girl and just tell you all of this. whats wrong me with me. your everything i wanted and more yet here you are thinking that i couldnt care less, that you dont mean anything to me, and that your the only one with emotional ties when in reality im just as bonded as you. only difference is that by me admitting this, i could probably make you stay. i could get everything i wanted, except id be like every other girl with their heart on their sleeve just asking to be cheated on and lied to. i cant do that to myself cause that pain would be so much greater than this one. you need more than i can give you. fuck, this wasnt supposed to end up like this!!!!! you were supposed to be like every guy i date, and we'd just chill til i loose interest and do our own thing. no "anniversary", no "gifts", no nothing. but you ruined that for me. the only thing im left to do now, is the only thing i dont want to do.. lose you. too bad you dont know.


memoirs of an imperfect angel.

i shouldnt have walked away, i wouldve stayed

if you said we couldve made, everything okay
but we just threw the blame back and forth
we tweeted love , like a sport
the final blow hit so low, im still on the ground
i couldnt have prepared myself for this fall
shattered in pieces curled on the floor
supernatural love conquers all,
remember we used to touch the sky..

lightening dont strike the same place twice
when you and i said goodbye, i felt the angels cry
cuz true loves a gift, but we let it drift
in the storm, every night
i feel the angels cry


baby im missing you, dont allow our love to lose
we gotta ride it through, im reaching for you
dont allow our love to lose, we gotta ride it through
im reaching for you,
lightening dont strike, the same place twice
you and i, said goodbye
felt the angels cry
true love's a gift, but we let it slip
in a storm, every night
i feel the angels cry..

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Oj.

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please please pleaaaaase, i really want him!! he's so perfect, hes small but not stocky, hes mainly black, and hes a boy!! he would totally fit the name OJ. please God, let nobody else go after him and please let him be hypoallergenic. I miss having that companion. AND LOOK HOW FREAKING CUTE HE IS. oh laaawwwwd. me and him would be perfect together. lol RACHEL + OJ = LOVE. ahah kk imma stop now. schools going pretty good, and work aswell minus the fact my perkins manager SCOTT is a damn THEIF. Dont worry, lil scotty boy.. karmas a bitcch and its cominnngggg. talk to you soooon !!